margaret.

A while back I met this interesting lady.
Wearing a beanie over her short tufty hair, and clothes roughly layered over one another, she would only utter a few words when asked a question.
Her walk was more of a shuffle, accompanied by eyes that wandered here and there but fled to the ground whenever she thought they would meet anothers.
I saw her before she saw me and vowed that if I saw her again I would do something. Maybe buy her lunch or find out her story, but for that moment I would just let her be, wandering the streets.
Then a niggle, a thought, maybe now, as I walked past her. Maybe she was hungry?
As we sat and ate, I studied her, asking questions that werent met with answers. She was focused on the fish and chips in front of her.
In that moment was left with a feeling that Margaret and I would meet again.

Since then there have been many moments I have seen her short unkempt figure, shuffling through town, her eyes wandering aimlessly.
I wish I could say that everytime I see her my heart jumps for joy and I am so eager to befriend this lady and love her as she is. But, I am ashamed to admit it but there have been far more times I have pretended I haven't seen her, carried on my daily business, and just walked on by no matter how in need she looks. I try to push the thought out of my mind and think of reasons to justify not even saying hello. I get so mad at myself everytime, once the opportunity has passed, and know what I should have done, and vow next time will be different.

The thing is, if I pretend I don't see her, I can go on with my life thinking that I can't do anything for her, I can stay inside my own little world and be comfortable. I can keep thinking that there is nothing I can do for her, that I am the most important thing, that all I have to do is look out for numero uno. This needs to change. I need stop trying to cover that little voice that urges me to do good, no matter how hard it feels or what it looks like to others. I need to embrace it.
I hope that next time I see the figure shuffling down the street I will go out of my way to say hello and see how she is, and be genuinely interested.
I would love to boldly show love, not just when it suits me, but always.
What a challenge.
Maybe it begins with a choice that needs to be acted out consistently?
I want to try to love like Jesus loved.
Consistently and unconditionally.
no matter who.

Margaret, I learn more from you than you would ever know.